Last night I went to see my sweet friend, Kym. She is a professional photographer who selflessly donated her time and resources to take newborn photos of Savannah when we brought her home. I walked in her studio excited to see the amazing pics she had taken for us. As I sat there watching the slide show of a beautiful baby girl, it hit me. I. Am. A. Mom. I am HER mom. Wow.
Obviously with the sleep deprivation, being spit up on, peed on, and pooped on you would think I would already understand the magnitude and reality of being a parent. Since Savannah was born my mind has been completely occupied with taking care of her best I can, making it through with little sleep, and trying to manage my time more effectively. I have spent little time taking it all in, letting the miracle of all that has happened in the last 4 months really settle within me. Last night, it hit me. The gratitude overwhelmed me to tears. Sitting there looking at that precious little face, the miracle we have the honor to raise, love washed over me. (Sorry for losing it a little right there in your studio, Kym) God’s love could never be more real to me. Savannah is such an amazing gift He has given us; what did we ever do to deserve this honor? To be a mom – to be HER mom…I am in awe.
How did Andy and I get to be so lucky to have hundreds (and I mean hundreds) of friends and family who have supported and loved us through this journey??? But most importantly, how do we give back??? How can we express how thankful we are to God and to all who have given to Savannah? We can’t. There are no words to describe the amount of love and gratitude we feel.
Hundreds of thank you notes are still waiting to be written. I am sure I will leave someone out – I hope not, but we have had a hard time keeping up. People have come out of the woodwork to support us; people we haven’t seen or talked to in years. We have not wanted for anything. From breast milk (yes breast milk) to money designated towards a college fund, we have been given everything we need. How do we repay it??
I pray that the Lord will bless us with financial means to be able to give back to other adoptive families in the future. I pray for some guidance and wisdom on what that looks like for us. I would love to be able to start a grant foundation who gives grants to middle class families or start a company who gives support to adoptive families in the hospital waiting for their baby to go home with them; some way to give back. For now, I will try to sit back and take it all in. This precious little human, as fussy as she can be sometimes, is a little miracle and the biggest blessing in our life.
***Savannah will be dedicated at our church this Sunday. This dedication means more to me than anything. Our family, friends and church family will be present declaring they will help raise her to know and love God. Andy and I will renew our vows to each other promising to love God first then each other so that we can love Savannah wholly. It is a symbol of the community of people who have joined us already to love and raise this precious miracle we hold in our arms. We would love for you to join us Sunday.***
To all who have loved us over the last 4 months,
Thank you for teaching us how to love others and give with a joyful heart. Thank you for showing us how much God loves us and how trusting in Him is always the right path. Thank you for planting a seed within us to “pay it forward” so that the blessing you gave us does not stop with Savannah. Thank you for loving her and being a present support system for her life. We love you all more than you know. Thank you will never be enough.
Love,
Andy and Flora
Picture taken by the fabulous Kym Hankerson at Couture Portraits